Living in a shared house often means developing a small but surprisingly sophisticated system of communication. While some housemates are happy to have a direct conversation about small issues, others prefer a more subtle approach.
This usually takes the form of the passive-aggressive note.
They appear quietly on fridges, cupboards and bathroom mirrors, often written in polite language that somehow feels considerably less polite once you read it.
Here are ten of the most common passive-aggressive notes you’ll find in shared houses.
1. “Please wash your dishes.”
A classic note that usually appears directly above a sink that is already full of dishes.
2. “Whoever used the last of the milk could you please replace it.”
Written in calm handwriting that somehow communicates deep disappointment. Especially when accompanied by a dry teabag and mug.
3. “This is a shared kitchen.”
A short sentence that manages to imply that someone has been behaving as though they live entirely alone.
4. “Please clean the shower after you use it.”
Often written after someone has discovered a truly impressive quantity of hair in the drain.
5. “Bins don’t empty themselves.”
A note that appears after the bin has reached structural heights that suggest it has not been emptied for quite some time.
6. “If it’s not yours, don’t eat it.”
Usually written on a fridge shelf that previously contained something delicious.
7. “Please turn the lights off.”
Often taped next to a light switch that someone apparently believes should remain permanently on.
8. “Quiet after 11pm please.”
Appearing mysteriously the morning after someone held what they believed to be a very reasonable midweek gathering.
9. “Cleaning rota on the fridge.”
The note that announces the arrival of a new household government system.
10. “Thanks.”
A single word written at the end of a long note that clearly indicates the writer is not actually thankful at all.
Passive-aggressive notes rarely solve the problem they were written to address. But if you’ve lived in a shared house for long enough, chances are you’ve seen at least a few of them quietly appearing around the kitchen.
